04.14.09
04-14-09
So 29 nine years ago I gave birth to my baby, you Lucas, i love you more today than that day because you grew and changed and became you not just my idea of you.
I miss you, I want you here with me to touch, to hold to build a life with, but you are not and I am here in the dark.
I took Bernardo to Atlanta today and it made me feel good. He needed me to help him and I did but I did not steal his diginty. You could have asked for help and I would have given it without the need for the loss of self. I am a good mother… I was a good mother to you.. I still love you.. I will survive…. but I miss you… I love you.. I wish you were here with me … but i will let go..as it does me no good and i’m sure it hurts you too…..i’m sorry.
love mom